Had a very short visit w/ Dr. O today. Apparently everything is progressing along well. I'm down 51 pounds since my consultation in April, and down 44 pounds since I checked into the hospital. All together, since the beginning of the year, I am down 61 pounds.
Stopped by the Predators pro shop today in hopes of finding some new shirts. I am now in a men's medium, which feels good. The women's selection is less than desirable (see my other blog), so I passed on buying anything from that section & got some men's shirts.
I need to find someone to take some pictures for me. I'm not the best at self-portraits, and the photo booth app on my MacBook is only good for so much. I've had a request for pictures, so I better hurry up & find someone to take some.
I tried on a pair of my old pants the other night. I couldn't stop looking at the difference, and didn't know whether to laugh or cry! Laugh because of how far I've come, or cry because of how big I had gotten and thinking about all the things in life I let pass me by because of my weight. Not dating, not going out with friends, all because I was ashamed of my appearance. I faked it pretty well all those years, but inside I was sad. I'm so glad I made the decision to change my life and have the surgery. I feel like my confidence is coming back, and I feel myself smiling more. I'm still insecure sometimes, but that's just part of it. Sometimes it's hard to remember I'm not that girl anymore, and I still have my "I feel fat" moments, but it's getting easier. I'm finding new ways to spend my time, working with some other girls on hockey merchandise for women, so that's exciting. I paid the last of the surgery bills off today too, so now I just need to start working on paying off some debt, then get another job. Still trying to decide about taking some classes too. The world is looking better by the day!